At the beginning of a relationship it is easy for two people to connect with one another. We loved coming home at the end of the day and being asked:  “How was your day?” All the kisses, the hugs, the conversations, the sex, the whole nine yards felt sweeter than honey! With the passage of […]

It is often said that successful people do the things that unsuccessful people either don’t want to do, can’t do, or won’t do. I have found in all my years of doing counseling with couples, that the same axiom holds true for them: happy couples do the things that less happy or unhappy couples don’t […]

  It never hurts to revisit an old topic, one that applies to every one of us: I am referring to effective conflict management. Three or four times a week I have a couple in my office and one of them says they are afraid of conflict. When I asked them what that means, typically […]

Reducing Defensiveness There are several things that get in the way of relationship satisfaction, and I suppose it’s up for debate as to which one is the most destructive. The one I see most frequently in my office, usually on a daily basis, is defensiveness.  From what I can tell, no one is immune–we ALL […]

One of the most painful and difficult experiences to recover from is that of betrayal. Obviously, infidelity is one form of betrayal, but there are many others as well.  Rather than list the possible range of betrayals, do the following: 1.  Find a pen or pencil and some paper so you can take some notes. […]