Reducing Defensiveness There are several things that get in the way of relationship satisfaction, and I suppose it’s up for debate as to which one is the most destructive. The one I see most frequently in my office, usually on a daily basis, is defensiveness.  From what I can tell, no one is immune–we ALL […]

  Yelling at Children This is a topic that has meaning for everyone. All of us have raised our voices, probably more than once. No, I did not come from a home of screaming parents or siblings. However, I do see many families and couples who yell a lot at each other, and the short […]

How To Re-Build Trust   As you can see by the title, the word “re-build” implies that the trust between the two of may have been damaged.  The damage may range from minimal to substantial. The range of events that can have a negative impact on trust goes from minor things that we say we […]

  One way to undercut a relationship is by not managing conflict effectively. And that will usually occur one of two ways: Either you are afraid of conflict, and avoid it, or your methods of managing conflict render you more like a bull in a china shop than like a loving partner. Both methods may […]

I have been in practice long enough to see many couples and families develop over the the past thirty years.  While there are countless stories over a full range of of topics,  one that greatly interests me involves divorce. Many couples and individuals have come to counseling after divorcing fifteen, twenty or twenty five years […]